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Satire – The 10 Commandments for Modern Church Goers
1. Thou shalt put God first on your calendar unless something fun comes up.
2. Thou shalt not allow images to replace God unless it is a husband, wife, child, boyfriend or girlfriend.
3. Thou shalt not take my name in vain unless you use text talk like OMG because that is LOL.
4. Thou shalt keep yourself holy in church, but don’t take it too seriously day to day.
5. Thou shalt honor your parents as long as you want to obey them.
6. Thou shalt not kill others except by gossiping which can kill their reputation.
7. Thou shalt not steal except from those insured because insurance will pay them back.
8. Thou shalt not commit adultery unless it makes you really happy because God wants you to be happy.
9. Thou shalt not lie about others except when they lie about you or when it keeps you out of trouble.
10. Thou shalt protect yourself from coveting by buying everything before everyone else.
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