PerryDox – BeJustAChristian

I am incredible! I must be incredible! After all, an incredible woman married me! Now before you think I’ve gone insane … “too late”… there is truth to the principle even if I don’t always live up to it. And I am not just speaking about me or for me. We often focus on the Worthy Woman of Proverbs 31. How can I be a man worthy of a Proverbs 31 woman? How can I be a “Proverbs 31 Man?” I think this is an important question for several reasons:

• The son, not the daughter, is the original audience.
• The husband is spoken of often in this acrostic poem of a worthy woman.
• Women often are overridden with inadequacy at their failures to match the worthy woman when the husband is spoken of often in this poem.
• If a man is not worthy of a worthy woman, why should she marry him?
• A man should not expect more from his woman than he expects from himself.

All of this takes in to consideration that the primary audience of this poem is the man, not the woman. It is a mother speaking to her son, and therefore by inspiration it is God speaking to men (Proverbs 31:1-2). This mother’s advice is one of the upmost importance, even causing consternation in the mother: “What should I say, my son? What, son of my womb? What son of my vows?” (v.2). This married mother wants good for the son of her husband. So let’s begin by making two obvious points:

• A worthy man begins by listening to his parents.
• A worthy man begins by listening to his God.
• A worthy parent speaks God’s wisdom.

“The Proverbs 31 Man” description begins before the glorious poem describing “The Proverbs 31 Woman.”

• Don’t Waste Yourself Looking for the Wrong Kind of Woman – v.3
• Don’t Waste your Mind on Alcohol – v.4-5
• Do Speak for Those Underprivileged – v.8
• Do Act for Those Underprivileged – v.9

Now some might object and say, “Hey, you skipped vv.6-7 which gives permission to drink.” OK, I want to be fair. Drinking leads to forgetting and is for troubled people. Also drinking is for those not looking for the worthy woman of vv.10-3; so it therefore is not for the worthy man of vv.10-31. Is that the type of man you want to be? Is that the type of man you want your wife to be married to? Is that they type of man you want your daughter to marry? Is that the type of man you want your son to be? This originally was written from a queen-mother to her son the king, to a king about his queen. If we want to have a queen for a wife, then we need to act like a king!

As we begin this passage, the writer asks a pertinent question (one which men are still asking today): Who can find a woman of excellence – one of high noble character (v.10) and class? What a powerful combination – Character and Class. There is almost a sense of frustration in the question. It’s as if he is pacing back and forth, scratching his head, pondering, muttering things under his breath like:

• Where do you look?
• Aren’t they in the usual places?
• What is she like?
• How would I know one if I saw one?
• There must not be very many around if you can’t find them!
• She must be pretty picky about the men she hangs out with.
• If there aren’t very many out there, but there are lots of guys looking, how do I stand a chance of attracting her?

Where do we begin looking? In the mirror! One of the most powerful secular songs is Michael Jackson’s “Man in the Mirror.” If you are not familiar, check it out. Let’s go back briefly to the very first piece of advice the mother said to the son: “Don’t spend your energy on women or your efforts on those who destroy kings.” Summed up, don’t look in the wrong places for a good woman. It reminds me of an old, corny pickup line: “What’s a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?” Maybe she isn’t a nice girl! Or maybe she is there to convert you to Christ, not to date you!

When it comes to dating, there is a lot of wasted time by both sexes because they are not focused on being a worthy man or a worthy woman. Dating to them is a game that turns into a life sentence with someone they never should have dated. A young man, married only a year, told me how he decided to find a wife. He showed a lot of wisdom, and common sense. He said, “You are not going to find a wife where you are not.” By that he meant, if you do not frequent certain establishments like bars, etcetera, then what makes you think you should go to such places to find a wife? Look for a wife where you are, because then you will find a woman who has the same interests as you. He found his wife at work. I found mine at church. When Janet and I were dating, she worked at a bank. Her friends asked incredulously, “Where would you meet a preacher, because it wouldn’t be in a bar?” Of course, for the spiritually minded, there is a simple answer to that question.

So let’s not overlook that there is a man of Proverbs 31 also. If we want our wife to be the excellent wife of Proverbs 31, then we need to be the excellent husband of Proverbs 31. Can a husband or a wife reach their full potential without the other also becoming their best? Who is a Proverbs 31 Man?

• A Man Who Is Willing to Look and Wait – v.10
• A Man Who Knows The Value Of A Worthy Woman – v.10
• A Man Who Finds a Trustworthy Woman and Trusts Her – v.11
• A Man With A Good Reputation – v.23
• A Man Who Is Wise – v.23
• A Man Who Praises His Wife – v.28
• A Man Who Praises His Wife Above All – v.29
• A Man Who Praise His Wife Publicly – v.31
• A Man Who Values Inner Qualities – v.30

Tags: Article, Dating, Marriage

This entry was posted by PHall on Saturday, June 14th, 2014 at 10:28 pm and is filed under Proverbs. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.